Be Yourself. But Not Like That.

“Just be yourself!”

Sounds lovely, doesn't it?

Until someone actually does.

An autistic person avoids eye contact.

“Why are you being rude?”

Someone needs a quiet break.

“Why aren't you joining everyone?”

Someone answers a question honestly.

“Wow. You could've said that more nicely.”

So, which version of “yourself” is acceptable?

Apparently, the one that makes everyone else comfortable.

Here's what I find interesting.

We tell people to embrace their differences. Then we expect everyone to communicate, socialise and behave in exactly the same way.

As a social worker working with young people, I've learned that sometimes what looks like someone being difficult is simply someone experiencing the world differently.

Not every silence is disrespect.

Not every direct answer is an attitude problem.

And not everyone needs to make eye contact to show they're listening.

Maybe being inclusive isn't about telling people they can be different.

Maybe it's about how we react when they actually are.

Because “be yourself” shouldn't come with terms and conditions.